to the one that left me, i don't know what i did to you, what we did to you. no i'm not speaking for the whole family; i have no idea what went down between you and them. i am talking about the kids. me and my brother and my sister. you were a big part of our lives. we saw you almost every time that we saw our dad. we loved you. i loved you. you were my cool aunt. you did things with us. you were different from aunt carol, who i did and do not get along with. we used to go puttputt, swim, we went to a hotel on new years eve together one year. then one weekend you were gone. i asked where you were and aunt carol pulled me onto her lap, hugging me. she said that you had gone away for a while. and no one could tell me when you were coming back. i'm surprised that i remember that moment. but i do. we never saw you again. i am pretty sure that we didn't see your daughter, my cousin, kristin again either. i hear that she had a kid with billy. did you know that grandma had no idea that the baby existed? i'm not even sure if it's still a baby. probably growing up fast. i was the one who accidentally blurted it out to my sweet grandma that she had a great-grandchild she had no idea was even alive. do you know how that hurt her? do you know what you've put this family through? i'm sorry that you had problems after your divorce. sorry that you got a drug addiction. sorry that you were fired from your job. sorry that lost your apartment. sorry that no one would give you money. sorry that you lived out of your car and used your daughter's house for showers. sorry that you felt like you had to leave us. sorry that you never wanted to talk to any of us ever again. but what did i ever do to you? i know that i was a mean child at times, but i only ever remember loving you. it killed me when you left. sorry that i wasn't good enough for you to come back to.
