have i ever mentioned that my man hates kids? well littler ones. anyway. he broke up with me for an hour last night. we talked about why and everything. then he said that he was just doing it for me because he thought i couldn't do it; he thought i wanted to break up though. thought that it would be easier for me now than it would be later. but it won't ever be easy.
i want to be with that boy forever. i love him. i know that he's going away. and that we're young. that i am very young. but this is how i feel. i want this. nothing has ever felt so right. he's my best friend. he's boyfriend. he's my love. i don't know why it's taken him so long to realize how i feel about him. i've told him. it may just be that i am not very good with words. i am not inspiring or inciteful. but i mean what i say. and i do love him.
you know why he said to me last night? that he just wants to make me happy. he said that, for me, he would get married and have kids. because that would make me happy. he does not like kids. as far as i know he does not want to get married. i've known that for a while. more than anything, that tugs at my heart. he would do that. for me. gosh, i'm about to cry. haha.
he asked if i would wait for him. as long as it takes. that we might not see each other for two years. i don't think that it would be that long. but i am pretty sure i would wait. i want no one else. it would get lonely, but i don't always need someone around for me to touch. haha, that sounds bad. but for real. i would wait. whenever i think about him i hear a song in my head that says "i'm gonna marry that boy someday." i am pretty sure that it is a country song. and that means it's old. but i do love it.
well i guess that's enough. alaine doesn't reply fast enough to me. and tyler said that he was going to call. but he hasn't. maybe he will later. i have socialvibe though. i need to put my badge on here. yeahhh.
i love you.<3