sooo...i don't think i am going to blog about things that are bothering me anymore. and if i do i will post something stupid and meaningless right after so that the other post will hide itself. i think i speak my mind too much when i do that. blogs have actually caused some real problems for me in the past. people can't handle what goes on in other people's heads very well. i mean, sure it helps sometimes. if you can't say something to someone then you could write it down. but not if it's something insulting that you are too much of a pussy to say to their face. and if you need to update people about your life. i don't really need to do that though. which is why this blog is so barren. i only blog when i have something on my mind that i don't really want anyone to read, ever. and that doesn't make much sense at all. i guess it just makes me feel better knowing that people that i don't know could read what i write and think about it. i don't know. i'm a bit of an odd ball. and that's pretty much all i can say about that.
i started blogging because i love writing, and i wanted to see what all this was about. if i had an archive up here, you could see how much i've progressed. i used to write a line or two, color the text, format the alignment, insert a picture here and there. now i just write blocks of text. my opinions are better formed and i have more of a mind to write them. i guess that is mostly good; it's a sign that i've actually been learning and growing up. but i wish i could go back to being so simple. sometimes it's too much. i hate thinking, "what is the proper form of its to use? should i use an apostrophe? or no?" it is stupid. i don't like it.
i do not really know why i started writing this. i think i just wanted my last post to be lost to my archive. i feel bad about it. i should have said that to him and not to no one. it's stupid and juvinile of me. i was thinking today, if me and baby are together 'forever' are we going to communicate important information and conversations only through technology? because neither of us talk about anything important in person. i think our lives have become so impersonal...it's a little saddening, isn't it?
i recently gained back one of my best friends. it took us a year to get over what happened with us. sometimes i think about what would happen if...yeah i'm not going to write that here. maybe i'll slide that between a few posts in another blog that i have.